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программистский юмор (англ.) - Поклонник деепричастий Page 2 [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Anatoly Vorobey

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программистский юмор (англ.) [июл. 4, 2011|12:26 am]
Anatoly Vorobey
(из внутрирабочего мемохранилища. Для тех, кому любопытно, вот ссылка на истоки жанра)

  • You have a problem and decide to use recursion.
    Now you have a problem.

  • You have a problem and decide to use Java.
    Now you have a ProblemFactory.

  • You have a problem and decide to use Python.
    Now you don't know what you have. Could be an int, a string, a list or a problem.

  • You have a problem and decide to use threads.
    Two now problems have you.

  • You have a problem and decide to use Lisp.
    Now you have a list of problems.

  • You have a problem and decide to use locks.
    Now you have

  • You have a problem and decide to use delegation.
    Now your problem is your problem's problem.

  • You have a problem and decide to use anagrams.
    Now you have lamb rope.

...И мой любимый вариант...

  • You have a problem and decide to dissolve it in water.
    Now you have a solution.
СсылкаОтветить

Comments:
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[User Picture]From: isk
2011-07-04 06:54 am
You have a problem and decided to use jQuery
now you have a $('problem')

You have a problem and decided to use Haskell
now you have a lazy problem
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: isk
2011-07-04 07:02 am

переиначеное старое

You have a problem and decided to use Forth
problem a have you now
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: plakhov
2011-07-04 07:35 am
You have a problem and decide to use С.
ow you have a pYou have a problem and decide to use С.
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: avva
2011-07-04 07:39 am
You have a problem and decide to use STL.
Now you have a _Hashtable_iterator<std::pair<const basic_string<char, str::char_traits<char>, std::allocator<char> >, int>, basic_string<char, std::char_traits<char>, std::allocator<char > >...
(Ответить) (Parent) (Thread) (Развернуть)
[User Picture]From: orkatt
2011-07-04 07:58 am
You have a problem and decide to use XP.
Now you have the monkey-problem.
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: egle
2011-07-04 08:33 am
:D
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: a_bronx
2011-07-04 08:37 am
You have a deferred problem and decide to use short-circuit evaluation.
Now your problem is current.

(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: a_bronx
2011-07-04 08:54 am

Скорее всего кто-то уже додумался до этого варианта:

You have a problem and decide to try exception handling.
Now you have exceptional problems.
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dimrub
2011-07-04 09:21 am
Ты забыл еще вот этот, например:

You have a problem and decide to use STL
Now you have a _Hashtable_iterator<std::pair<const basic_string<char, std::char_traits<char>, std::allocator<char> >, int>, basic_string<char, std::char_traits<char>, std::allocator<char> >...
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dimrub
2011-07-04 09:23 am
А так же вот это очень нравится: You have a problem, and decide to use floating point.
Now you have 2.00000001 problems.
(Ответить) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: _1313
2011-07-04 09:34 am
You have a problem and decide to use HTML.
Now you have a <big>problem</big>
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: moon_aka_sun
2011-07-04 01:01 pm
You have a problem and decide to use J.
Now you have a puzzle.
(Ответить) (Thread)
From: (Anonymous)
2011-07-04 03:09 pm
You have a problem and decide to use Matlab.
Now you have double problem.
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: starshoj
2011-07-04 06:53 pm
Может быть буду в Тель-Авиве в след. выходные. Кофе?
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: avva
2011-07-04 06:57 pm
Я не пью кофе :) но все остальное - с удовольствием. Обязательно дайте знать, если будете.
(Ответить) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: zigmar
2011-07-04 08:42 pm

придумалось на досуге

You have a problem and decide to use Wikipedia.
Now problem needs citation.
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: n0_spam
2011-07-05 03:21 pm
В последнем нужно поменять water на alcohol, получится более правдоподобно.
(Ответить) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: fandaal
2011-07-14 08:38 pm
#if you use Python, there could be no problem!
#Just write
if type(a)==problem:
a=int(a)
#now you definitely have int instead of problem!
(Ответить) (Thread)
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