Anatoly Vorobey (avva) wrote,
Anatoly Vorobey

о брненцах и техасцах (англ.)

"Брненец говорит пражаку "А знаешь, что мы говорим о пражаках? Что вы свиньи"
А тот в ответ "А знаешь, что мы о вас?"
"Вообще ничего".

Мне это напомнило шутку из недавно читанной The Crossing Кормака Маккарти. Прошу прощения у незнающих английский, перевести не берусь (но если суть шутки неясна, можно спросить в комментариях). Под "lion" имеется в виду горный лев, т.е. пума.
You hear about the Texas lion and the New Mexico lion? the old man said.

No sir. I dont believe so.

There was this Texas lion and this New Mexico lion. They split up on the divide and went off to hunt. Agreed to meet up in the spring and see how they’d done and all and whenever they done it why the old lion been over in Texas looked just awful. Lion from New Mexico he looked at him and he said Lord son you look awful. Said what’s happened to you. Lion been over in Texas said I dont know. Said I’m about starved out. Other old lion said well, said tell me what all you been doin. Said you might be doin somethin wrong.

Well the Texas lion said I just been usin the old tried and true methods. Said I get up on a limb overlookin the trail and then whenever one of the Texans rides underneath it why I holler real big and then I jump out on top of him. And that’s what I been a doin.

Well, the old New Mexico lion looked at him and he said it’s a wonder you aint dead. Said that’s all wrong for your Texans and I dont see how you got through the winter atall. Said look here. First of all when you holler thataway it scares the shit out of em. Then when you jump on top of em thataway it knocks the wind out of em. Hell, son. You aint got nothin left but buckles and boots.

The old man fell across the steering wheel wheezing. After a while he began to cough. He looked up and wiped his watery eyes with one finger and shook his head and looked up at the boy.

You see the point? he said. Texans?

Billy smiled. Yessir, he said.

You aint from Texas are you?

No sir.

I didnt allow you was. Well. I better get on. You want to catch coyotes you come down to my place.

All right.

He didnt say where his place was. He put the truck in gear and pulled the sparklever down and pulled away down the road.
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